Ben Stokes has shared his reason behind his sudden retirement decision, admitting that four years as England’s Test captain had left him “burnt out”.
The 35-year-old’s move came on a day of high drama at Trent Bridge, with the news breaking while Stokes was in a bowling spell against New Zealand.
Stokes goes down as one of England’s best cricketers, but shared the impact of being captain had taken its toll.
“There are all sorts of emotions when this day comes to everyone. There’s relief, there’s happiness, there’s excitement, there’s sadness. All of those words, they sum it up pretty well,” he told Sky Sports.
“It’s the best thing that I’ve ever been asked to do – captain this team and captain this country – and I’ll never begrudge any moment where I’ve walked this team out. It’s simply the greatest honour you could ever put on your shoulders as a player.
“But there’s another side to it all which people don’t see, and people don’t understand.
“My family, and particularly my wife, can see what you go through emotionally. As good as it is, there are bits where it does get to you, it does drain you, it does affect you in a negative way.
“But, overall, it’s literally been four and a half years where I’ve loved every single moment. But sometimes, some moments have been harder than others.”
Ben Stokes shared he was suffering from ‘burnout’ as England captain
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Reflecting on his first summer Test win, which saw the victory celebrations turn into a night out, during which he stepped down from the next game and faced an ECB investigation, Stokes added: “The Lord’s Test brought back some kind of negative feelings about where I was in my career.
“I’ve worked so hard since getting back home [from Australia] to try and make things right. That’s what I thought I was doing. But I put so much time and effort into it I maybe, potentially burnt myself out.
“I gave myself every opportunity to think it was maybe just a blip, or something wasn’t quite right.
“But everyone I spoke to about the day it [retirement] happens, they just say it kicks you straight in the face. And I thought a few weeks ago that it did.
Stokes retires after playing international cricket for 15 years
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“As I was putting my pads on [Saturday], getting ready to go out there, that was the last nail in the coffin.
“It’s never, ever simple or easy with me, is it? That’s been one of the good things about my career, I guess.”
Stokes said he will follow the same route as Sir Alistair Cook and return to country cricket.
He continued: “Being back at Durham, I found not a reconnection but a new lease of life in my affection towards cricket.
Stokes said he will follow the same route as Sir Alistair Cook
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“And then I just couldn’t get that same feeling back here this week, as much as I was trying.
“I’ve been through some rocky times, personally, feeling like I’m pushing myself through or feeling I’m having to do something because it’s the right thing to do.
“I’m very excited about the next part of what I get to do, going back to play for my boyhood club. It might sound quite selfish, but this decision is genuinely the best thing for me right now.
“Whether it means it’s the best thing for the team going forward, I hope so. But it comes down to what I think will allow me to still love this game that I’ve played since I was a kid, and which has given me a career.”
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