How did you find a place?
I was freaking out because I didn’t know where I was going to live, and had already put up a smoke signal to my dead mother. Like, “Mom, I need your help.” And then I went to [an art gala], where I ran into these two guys I know who said, take ours.
That is lucky. I guess you struggle otherwise. I mean, I saw Madame Stanley and heard the dating stories.
I don’t have struggling dating stories. Are you kidding me? I don’t date.
Okay, something more casual. But you talk about getting the clap.
That’s part of the quirk.
Is it?
I mean, it’s not like something that damages you. You just have to take some pills and get rid of it. It wasn’t traumatic. Trauma is when your boyfriend gives you the clap.
Why are you not dating?
I have had two beautiful long term relationships in my life. Each of them was about seven or eight years. One of them is in my band, who’s my guitar player. Another one is my upstairs neighbor and co-cat parent. The minute I saw both of them, I was like, “Uh-oh!” I just knew that. I pursued them, they pursued me, and we were together. So if that happens to me again, great. I don’t care if it does or doesn’t. I mean, I love my life. I like that I can have sex with whoever I want, and I don’t have to feel bad about it.
I hear from so many people that are so burnt out on dating apps. What’s your advice for them?
I don’t know what to tell them. If that’s what they want, they should go for it. But I went for a career. I went for very wonderful friendships. You have dreams and you pursue them. But I will say that when I was young I knew that I was trans, and I knew that I didn’t really trust a lot of people, so I kind of thought I would end up living alone. I have this ratty little East Village apartment, which I have had for a long time, in the same building where I used to live with my ex. He still lives in it. And my best friend’s down the street. It’s like heaven, but I don’t want to die there, but I probably will. And now I got this dream, dream, dream apartment in Paris, which has a terrace. It’s not far from Père Lachaise cemetery. I hate sightseeing, but I like to go there and walk.
