(My debt is twofold; the one to John Prine’s “Crazy as a Loon” and the other to Ricky Gervaise for his sketch about death)
You might think that I’m a loser I can’t help what you see
That I’m bumping on the bottom Useless as can be;
Never destined to make much And you wouldn’t be wrong
I’m just bumping on the bottom That’s where I belong.
But through reincarnation As the good Buddha says
In my previous lifetimes I’ve seen better days;
I’ve been Winston Churchill And I know that you’ll scoff
Cos I painted those flowers When I was van Gogh
And in the 1590’s I would spend my days
Writing ‘A’ Level sonnets And ‘A’ Level plays;
And in the French Revolution For Heaven’s sakes
They went and cut my head off They didn’t like my cakes.
I was Bob and Jack Kennedy And Harvey Oswald too
Don’t ask me how I did it But I swear that it’s true;
And as the film star Marilyn I would have to confide
I really had some fun with My feminine side.
And at those conventions For similar minds
For reincarnation I’d be surprised to find
There’s a half dozen Caesars Which made me smirk
Cain and Abel and two Gandhis So how does that work?
But now I’m bumping on the bottom When greater was my worth
For hitherto I have been The greatest on all earth;
I’ve been the good and the gifted The best there’ll ever be
But now I’m bumping on the bottom That’s where you’ll find me.
Yes I’m bumping on the bottom That’s where you’ll find me.
